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Saturday, June 1, 2013

Hansel and Gretel --- Hinge and Bracket

Speranza

HILDA BRACKET:

Poor Jean Batkin. A very serviceable contralto. Big gel, y'know.

But I suppose it was her own fault.

The incident with the Mars Bars was the last straw.

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It happened like this.

Towards the end of our time with the Rosa Charles, Doctor Hinge had virtually taken control of the whole company, or at least the production side, and we decided to mount a special production of "Hansel and Gretel" for Christmas.

EVADNE HINGE:

That's right. And in the interests of realism, I had arranged for the gingerbread house in the last act to be decorated with real sweets.

Dame Hilda and I spent the entire day cutting up Mars Bars and sticking them round the walls.

HILDA BRACKET:

Of course, we had a magnificent cast.

The mother was played by Phoebe Lateral.

And the father was Bradford Tweats.

Such a pleasure to work with him again.

I myself played Hansel.

They all said I had the legs for it.

And I didn't mind showing them.

My Gretel was Pinky Willets.

If I remember, Topsey Hodgetts handled the Sandman _and_ the Dew Fairy.

But the problem was Jean Batkin -- who was singing The Witch.

EVADNE HINGE:

We did not know, you see, that she had an _inordinately_ sweet tooth. And a passion for Mars Bars.

HILDA BRACKET:

All during the First Act, in which she did not appear, she had steadily chewed her way through Evadne's painstaking embellishments to the gingerbread house.

EVADNE HINGE:

Egged on by Bradford Tweats, who had a peculiar sense of humour.

HILDA BRACKET:

And so, of course, the curtain rose on the Witch's house only to find that Evadne's gastronomic marvel had turned to a dismal _shack_.

EVADNE HINGE:

Well, naturally, poor Jean had to go.

We would normally had substituted Roma Wartski, a contralto who often guested with us.

But unfortunately she was not available.

HILDA BRACKET:

Fortunately, we were able to fall back on Gladys Etheridge, one of our own stalwarts.

She was to us what Edith Coates was to Sadler's Wells.

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